I now know why Milano Centrale railway station smells like a large urinal: because the toilets cost E1 entrance! We were all titillated with the news that it cost a pound to ‘spend a penny’ in London’s Harrods, but this is not quite the same experience. It even has electronic gates like the metro stations.

Ahhh, lovely, lovely Italy. Blessed is the country that gives hope to those of us plagued by the advent of aging. It’s a land where short, fat old people are papparazzi’d by amateur photographers in the narrow streets.










